Posted in Book Discussions, Bookish Stuff

Discussion Post: Why I Don’t Read Self-Help Books

Hey pals!! Today I am bringing you a post about why I don’t find myself reading self-help books and why I think my reason, if not right or popular, at least makes some sense.

Not me realizing its high time I post something meaningful instead of full stops for blog names and commas for comments πŸ™‚

Note: I don’t mean to insult anyone’s opinions. I am just sharing my own opinions. Also, this is a discussion posts so feel free to share your views in the comments.


Firstly, they sound hella boring. They feel like a long, tiring lecture that hardly helps. Everything just crowds inside of my brain and nothing makes much sense at all. It’s like getting a thousand pieces of advices all at once. I know there are some wonderful books out there, I might even read them some day. And though I know a few of these books can even make an impact on me, I just don’t find myself interested.

I avoid non fiction. It sounds too real and I read to escape this world, to escape the cruelty of humanity for at least that small period of time. To some point, even autobiographies are interesting because they at least they have a plot, a story. Self help books are completely different. They stretch on and on, with no meaningful story at all. Just hey-this-is-how-to-become-a better-individual stuff.

Mainly, I find the concept kind of weary. All the this-book-will-change-your-life thingy doesn’t interest me and I find it hard to believe. Also, they act as if they are great books when in reality, most of the advice is not even required. They give us advice on things we don’t even think about and that makes me feel useless.

What is believable is instead of giving tips about what to improve and how to be better, I would like to read about it in the form of a story. Basically, it’s like in a story or tale I witness those lessons instead of reading about them. And the concept of reading this thing seems boring while if I am actually going through an incident that will make me learn, that is something that leaves an impact. And story books are the best way to do it.

Okay, this GIF is totally unnecessary, but helllllo, Spongebob!!!

Another major reason is that the main focus of a self help book is to help us become a better person, so these books are filled with tips and tips and tips on self improvement. And instead of feeling like a book they feel like my school’s morning assembly which tries to give so much information that most of it just goes out of the head πŸ˜ͺ.

To summarize, I feel that self-help books give one so much information that hardly any of it sticks with them. On the other hand, if one is reading a random fantasy novel that they are totally loving and it has some random quotes thrown here and there, I feel like that’s what has a profound impact.

Now, I am not saying that these books are bad or that they do not help you at all. What I mean is that they teach us a 100 things and only 10 of those things will actually be able to fit into our little minds.


Now, I want to hear all of your thoughts on self help books. Do you agree with me? Why? Do you disagree with me? Why? Let me know in the comments so we can all chat.

So, that was it! The basic reasons why I don’t read self help books. Don’t forget to share all of your thoughts on this too.


Author:

Welcome to my site where I talk about all things bookish and from time to time, put my writing skills to test.

122 thoughts on “Discussion Post: Why I Don’t Read Self-Help Books

  1. I completely agree with you …….. those books are boring πŸ˜ͺ
    Isse achha to maths hi karlo ( I hate maths πŸ™‚)
    Also , why was this such a short post huh ?? Last one was quite a lot interesting ( and longer ) πŸ˜„

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I agree! I do however think that some self-help books can be helpful though. The only book I’ve read that could qualify as self-help that I’ve read has been the tidying up book by Marie Kondo, and I actually found that very helpful!

    In general though, I think it’s better to just read fiction books and read online articles about non-fiction topics.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Same, like despite what I said, I would like to read at least one self help book to see what the deal is all about haha. The only one I ever read I had to dnf.
      Yup, same. Thanks for reading!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I agree with you on the non-fiction point but self-help books only sound boring. There will be a point when you start relating to the author and then the book only gets better. I agree a few are boring lectures but others are very good.
    Try The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari perhaps

    Liked by 2 people

  4. SAME! I have read atleast 5 self help books and boy do they not help. They are so boring. I also read fiction to escape from the dreariness of this world. πŸ™ˆ
    Also I don’t think one formula works for all – each one needs to find their own way. That’s my opinion. 🀷

    Liked by 3 people

  5. You had me at ”Firstly, they sound hella boring” and boy I agree !!!!
    Also sometimes they state like the most obvious thing coated with heavy words, like who doesn’t know that you can witness sunrise if you will wake up early, like whatπŸ€¦β€β™€οΈπŸ€¦β€β™€οΈ
    I have read a line like this in a book it goes like “A fan work, a light bulb glows so why don’t you” and I was like because I am neither of that duhhhh

    Liked by 2 people

  6. I personally have never read a self help book – it has never occurred to me to read one? I think there is one in my home but only my dad reads it now and then. The only kind of non fiction I like are the ones about history / animals / drawings. I totally agree with you there – if I wanted to read about people and improving myself and those stuff, I’d much rather read a fiction book!
    Great postπŸ’›

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes same, but it did occur to me read them, but I have tried a few and overall they do not really work for me, not my type.
      And I know right, fiction novels sometimes leave such a deep impact!
      Thanks a lot, Jan!! ✨

      Like

  7. Self help books are not my cup of tea and I can’t bring myself to read any of them. I know the authors mean well, but, ughhhh. Self help books seldom make me feel better. Most of the time, I just think “Wow. My life sucks.”

    One of the main reasons why I adore reading books so much is because I want to go on a fantastical journey, not to see how many people think changing my diet will miraculously change my whole life. Personally, I think they are overrated. Sure, there may be some gems, but mostly, a big NO.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You got the gist πŸ˜‚. That’s exactly how I feel. I’m just waiting for that day when I can actually read a self help books that makes my day instead of lowering my self esteem even further than it already is πŸ˜‚.
      And that’s by I prefer fantasy too 😌.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. nehal!! this was a great discussion. i haven’t read or had the inclination to read any self-help books though i’m not averse to them, i do agree that story form would be way better. some people do want an obvious step by step, but yes to me it’s so much more meaningful when embedded in a story with other elements too! oh and 100% it is quite a lot of information, my brain can’t process haha, great post!! ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks a lot, Cherlle. And you got my point here πŸ˜‚. That’s exactly the trouble. I’ve tried reading a few but it never works well for me and I never feel like reading any other one. Personally, I would love a self help book that would help me instead of boring me, so hopefully there is a book out there for me.
      Thanks once again ✨

      Liked by 1 person

  9. I completely agree with you. I stay away from non-fiction books. The reason why I love reading to escape into a world far from reality and self-help books are just boring and well, they’re are fiction. You’re not alone, Nehal.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Haha lol πŸ˜‚.
        Also, glad to see you back on wp, you had been gone long, we all missed you πŸ˜ƒ! I need to check out some of your posts soon, schools and tuitions killing me right now πŸ˜‚πŸ˜ͺ

        Liked by 1 person

      2. The break turned out to be much longer than anticipated. Thank you. The 6wsp will restart from tomorrow onwards. I hope to see your response too. Online classes must be tough. Take care time, Nehal.

        Liked by 1 person

  10. I agree with EACH AND EVERY ONE of ur points. I do enjoy non-fiction books if they r well-written and interesting, once in a while. I haven’t read many self-help books, but the few times I ever did pick up a self-help book, I threw it away before I was halfway through. I just can’t bear people telling me to do this and do that and this is how u do things. Even if they do mean well, and are only just trying to help, I feel like they’re bossing me about and I get irritated, and almost always make a rule of doing the opposite of what they say lol πŸ˜‚ Oh, and like u said, they are also so full of advice that I forget about 90% of it as soon as i finish the book (if i ever even manage to finish it), and then I feel like I’ve just wasted all my time and got nothing in return – I haven’t enjoyed myself and I haven’t even learnt anything much.
    Amazing post, Nehal!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yup same, if non fiction reads like an actual story or like a historical fiction, I guess it works for me too but I just haven’t read many.
      I know right πŸ˜‚, it’s like we are idiots who need to be talked sense into.
      Thanks a lot πŸ˜€

      Liked by 1 person

  11. I totally get where you’re coming from, Nehal πŸ˜‚ I pretty much never read self-help books either, and when I do pick them up, I’m always a bit puzzled as to why people think they’re interesting… I mean, usually the information in there is stuff I think is pretty obvious (Like, wow, you realized taking time to relax and reflect on yourself makes you happier 😱😱 Who would have thought??), and then there aren’t even characters I can relate to! And no plot!
    Although I do like reading nonfiction every once in a while – mathy stuff, books about nature, biographies… So I guess it’s not really the lack of characters and plot that scares me off, but the fact that I don’t feel as though self-help books have much to teach me πŸ˜… Though of course, I may just not have found the right ones yet…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lmao, I know right πŸ˜‚. Not to mention we don’t even care all that much about the narrator. Like I get they had a revelation and their life is better now, but how many times have people told us the same thing!? πŸ™„
      Omg same, sometimes I think I should actually read some self help books and figure out why my life feels all over the place and get some good out of it, but then my fantasy and dystopian tbr starts eyeing me weirdly πŸ‘€. So I don’t do it πŸ˜‚.
      Thanks for reading, Naemi.
      Ps- just had this weird revelation, had you been Indian, I would’ve said “Naemi Didi” which is how you refer to girls older than you to show respect. I don’t know why I just said that πŸ˜ΆπŸ˜‚πŸ€£

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh, who cares if I’m Indian or not, I’ll take all the respect I can get πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ And maybe you’ve uncovered the true reason why my life is so chaotic – I probably read way too many fantasy and dystopian novels too πŸ€” But if that’s the price I have to pay to read the interesting stuff, I don’t care 😁 I’ll take a chaotic life over self-help books any day!

        Like

  12. I can relate to this 10000 times. It’s so hard to get through a non fiction book. I get enough knowledge from my college books and I don’t have the extra brain cells to capture more info than I can handle. I respect people who can read non fiction and actually enjoy them but I can’t. It’s too much work for my tiny head.πŸ˜…

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Well if you are still in school, reading non fiction would be much more difficult don’t you think? cuz you have to study for 6 hours at school and then you have to come home and do home work. Fiction books are the only way you can loosen your mind after a hectic day. It’s easy to get through and so much fun. 😁

        Liked by 1 person

  13. I agree with you. You are a wise girl.

    Those self-help books are written for individuals who fail to achieve their dreams. Though, they’re a bit illogical and irritating. You’ll prefer to read these books at the age of 25 to 30. So leave them for now.

    Self-learning is the a way to learn anything of your interest faster, in a better way. So purpose of education is not reading books, it is β€” β€œ Learn the way to learn” (topics, issues, life etc.)

    *Well, your approach shows that you have something better than self help books or their alternative option. So fetch it. Share on your blog. Together we’ll enjoy the process of learning.

    Happy Blogging.
    Happy learning. πŸ˜ƒπŸ‘

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yeah exactly, self learning is perhaps the only way you can learn stuff. Self help books seem like they shove all the knowledge upon you πŸ˜‚.
      I’ll see if I can, if I interpret you right here.
      You too πŸ˜„!!

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Very thoughtfully written. I agree. I read non-fiction, particularly autobiographies and science related Books. I’ve been wanting to read finance related Books like “Rich Dad Poor Dad” for quite some time but couldn’t get over the time constraints. But when it comes to Books on self-help or productivity, I try to be more productive. Instead of reading the book, I search for a YouTube video and gather the book notes. This way, I save the time spent reading 500 pages and still get the enlightenment! πŸ˜…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am not much of a non fiction person but I get the appeal. And that’s a great thing to go, pretty sure that it saves a lot of your time πŸ€ͺ.
      Thanks for reading, Esdi. I am glad you liked it!!

      Liked by 1 person

  15. I do agree with you. My problem is that I’m so much better at giving advice and opinion than actually taking it. Ugh….I read the stuff and it’s like no shit Sherlock. Like everyone knows that. It’s funny but I don’t read a lot of nf either and I agree I always think it’ll be boring.
    Now …. with that being said. I have been listening to an audio book that is self help and it’s actually pretty good. Some good tips on anchoring in the moment. So they’re not all bad….
    BUT trust me….my advice is best. lol.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Omg, I know right. We hear all these great stuff but it is so hard to actually imply it on ourselves. Even I find non fiction kinda boring, unless it actually has a plot and reads like a fiction.
      I’m glad you’re enjoying your audiobook, hope it works out for you.
      Haha, yes it sure is.
      Thanks so much for reading.

      Liked by 1 person

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