When I say slept through the climax of this book, I mean “literally” slept through it, and not “figuratively”.
Hey Pals!! So today, I am doing a spoiler free review of The Near Witch by Victoria Schwab.
Spoiler Alert: I hated it.

Synopsis:
I don’t care about the GoodReads synopsis, so here is all you need to know. This book follows the story of a girl named Lexi in a town where kids start disappearing all of a sudden *yawns* and people are blaming the new stranger named “Cole” *sighs* who has been spotted recently for causing the trouble. Lexi obviously falls in love with this character-less person*dies of exhaustion*.
My Thoughts in a gist:
I’ve been reading this book since forever, and it seems like it’s actually a big achievement for me for having finished it finally. I should’ve DNFed it, but I love strongly hating a book, so I thought it would be good for a review. So here we are.
There is absolutely nothing that I liked about this book, nothing at all, at least not for now. So I’ll just give a full review as to why I disliked it.
The Narration:
I found the narration awful. This book is narrated by Heather Wilds and I absolutely hated that narration for some reason. I don’t think it was bad or anything, I guess it’s just my personal preference. When I’m reading a book, it usually takes quite some time for me to actually like the narration, and it slowly grows on me. But for this book, it hardly ever did. I hated the accent of the person and the narration was super monotonous and dull.
The Characters:
Ugh, do I have issues! I freaking hate every single character of this book. I don’t understand how Lexi fell for Cole. The guy has zero personality, except for the fact that he can control the wind, he seems to have no individual personality traits. At least Lexi had some personality but I didn’t like her much either. I didn’t care about any of the other characters in the novel either. It was all just bleh.
The Plot:
Unoriginal.
The Writing:
Unoriginal.
The Romance:
Unoriginal.

Was that too short? š I guess it was. Here are the lengthy opinions then.
The Plot:
Lexi is just this random girl who thinks that it is her responsibility to solve the mystery of the disappearing kids which I found kinda obvious and cliche, so yeah, you can’t blame me for disliking it.
The Writing:
The writing had some very commonly phrases like “I released a breath I didn’t realize I was holding” so it kind of pissed me off.
The Romance:
As for the romance, I have never hated a romance more, well maybe I have but let’s not talk about that right now. It felt so much like insta-love, when not to mention, the love interest didnt even seem to have any individual personality.
Oh wait, I just realized that this is the debut book of this author, so um…..I didn’t mean to insult the book or the author š³. I just disliked it with a strong passion and felt the great need to share it for some unknown reason. I love the author though, and I’m planning to read more books by her. This one just didn’t do it for me.
What I meant by sleeping through the climax:
I had eventually DNFed this book, and I started buddy reading two other books. So at 11p.m. on one day, I had read my share of those two books and like, I as just lying on my bed not knowing what to read and was stressing about the fact that I was wasting valuable time not reading, so reluctantly, I decided to read this book. This book literally acted like a lullaby and put me sleep š. Then my father came and woke me up as I hadn’t drank my milk and I realized that the book had finished on a happy ending with people shaking hands and all and I had missed the climax ššš. So yeah, I never went back to reading it again, I was just glad it was over š.
My Rating:

Aaah, it feels so nice to give a book a 1 star rating š.
So, that’s it. Have you read this book? What are your thoughts on it? Are you planning to read it anytime soon? Let me know in the comments š.

Wow!š
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Hope you had a good sleep!š
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I sure did !š
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šIkr
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Hahahah – one of the funniest book reviews I’ve read on here. š The title had me smiling but the rest of it – wow – so brutal! If I were you I would have definitely DNF-ed it.
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š I am so glad you enjoyed it and it made you laugh š
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šš I have heard that this is indeed pretty slow
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slow! Are nothing happens for Merlin’s same!!!!!!!!
Lol yeah, you can see my anger šš
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šš¤£ I pity the characters
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Am I allowed to laugh?šš
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Omg yeah, you are š. I’m actually pleased that it made you laugh šš
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Gotcha! Thanks for the review š
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šhaha.
My pleasure!!
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I have always said that V. E. Schwab isn’t the best author out there, it’s people who don’t believe it- Invisible Life of Addie LaRue isn’t as great as everyone thinks- sure, the plot is unoriginal, but the writing style’s below average.
Sorry for the rant, and thank you for coming to my TED Talk
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Yeah, Addie Larue was kinda pretty slow for me too. I do understand why people would love it, but also why you’d hate it.
Hehe, my pleasure to listen to your TED talk (:
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woah
eh
hilarious title and post nehal
insta love is absolutly horrible and cringy
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Thank you Aanya!!
I know right! It’s the worst
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Aanya !!!!!!!! Happy ravenclaw pride dayyyyy šš
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You literally commenting to her reply and not to my post!? š
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Awesome post Nehal ! M sure I wonāt read that book ! Ur review literally made me laugh
Happy ? š
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šno
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š
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ššš I’m just pulling your leg
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U think I wonāt understand?
š
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I knew you won’t understdn š
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Thank you!!šš
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Same to you!
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This review is hilarious. I want to feel bad that I planned on reading it but.. I enjoyed this too much. Thanks so much for posting! š¹š
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I’m glad you enjoyed it š. You can give it a shot but it’s not anything original or new so I suggest not, but it’s up to you. And my pleasure šš
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My dance card is too full for sub par writing. š¤
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ššš
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Very honest review eh?ššš„
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It is, it is!š
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Great review Nehal ahhh and thank you for this new perspective since VE Schwabās books have always been really enjoyable for me! Oh man sleeping through the climax?? Sorry that you found it unoriginal and it couldnāt redeem itself halfway – but I have to agree, it is satisfying rating a book one star from time to time!! Lovely post!! š
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My pleasure, Cherelle!
Yeah, it was pretty weird indeed, sleeping š. I’m glad we relate on giving a book a 1 star.
Thank you š¤
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Hahaha – this review was hilarious! I always love a good rant š And The Near Witch is actually one of the very few V.E. Schwab books I haven’t read yet – but I’ve never really been that interested in it, either, and your review didn’t really do much to change my mind š¤£š¤£š¤£
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I’m glad you enjoyed it, Naemi š.
And yeah, don’t read this book, it ain’t worth it š
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Oh my, I LOVE this review!! I need more salty reviews. I haven’t read this one yet buuuut now I’m rethinking that lol I have only enjoyed one of her books so I haven’t been in a rush to pick this one up.
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I’m glad you enjoyed it, Alicia. And yeah, it’s better if you don’t read this book, it ain’t worth it š
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I need to come visit this blog more often! Your content is amazing š
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Don’t worry about sleeping throught the climax, because it didn’t even make any sense. it was all a confusing mess. I also gave this a very low rating. I did enjoy her Shades of Magic series a lot though and will be reading Addie LaRue soon š
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Ha, glad to know that š. This book was pointless realy.
I hope to read that series soon, and I’ve read Addie larue- it was a nice book
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Thank you so much. I’m glad you like it š¤
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After reading your review.. I don’t think I’ll even look at the cover of the book š
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šš¤£š¤£
You’ll indeed save a lot of time š
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